Today was the fist time I have stood before a group to give my testimony. It was especially meaningful to stand before the women in my own church. This is what God put on my heart to say today:
It has been my vision for the past six months to be standing before you as I am this morning and thank you for the incredible prayers you have sent up on my behalf. It is because of you that I wanted to be a part of Glenkirk’s Women’s Ministry this year. I see faces out there of women who I have looked up to and who have inspired me over the years. As we study great characters in the Bible, I want you to know there is great character among you women. Rick Warren was quoted recently as saying, “God is more interested in our character than our comfort.” My testimony starts with all my comfort zones being taken away in a very abrupt way.
It was this past May when my precious friend Cindy Axton came before you asking for prayer for me. I had just begun the long process of being diagnosed with stage 4 metastatic breast cancer. Five months ago I would not have known what metastatic meant. But I discovered in the six weeks that it took to fully diagnose my cancer, that metastatic means that the cancer in my breast had spread to my bones. In fact, if it were not for a very stiff neck that would not go away, I would not have known I had anything going on in my body.
The day after my chiropractor broke the news to my husband and me, I sat at my kitchen table in shock and despair. I don’t remember much about that day, but in the afternoon before my kids came home from school, I remember looking over at an envelope on the counter that held the Sunday school lesson that I was to teach that weekend. With the intension of calling Anthony and getting out of it, I opened the envelope and found God’s first words to me through the title “God is at His best when life is at its worst.” There were two verses God gave me that day:
Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things, God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose
Hebrews 13:5
Never will I leave you or forsake you
It was in that moment I realized that this was God’s plan for me, and He had prepared me all my life for what was about to happen. I still had a choice that day. Do I trust God, or do I carry this burden myself? I chose to surrender. Total surrender came slowly over the next month. How do you surrender your future with your husband and children? During a phone call from Betsy, one of our ministers, she said, "Sandy, God loves your kids more than you." I found that the more I surrendered the more God gave me peace. And the more I devoured His word, the more I learned that His promises are true, and His word is powerful.
Has God been at His best in the darkest moment of my life? I stand before you humbled and in awe of what He has done. God has taken this broken vessel named Sandy Boulware, and He has shown his light through the cracks and imperfections of my life. He has given me a new song, and through modern day technology (the computer), I have been able to share my faith in ways that I could have never imagined. Before I went into surgery on May 30th to repair my severely damaged neck, God prompted me to start a blog. The blog was intended to inform friends and family of my condition and lessen the burden of hundreds of e-mails. In the three days before my surgery, I had almost 1,000 hits! People wrote and encouraged me, and I wrote and shared my faith. It takes my breath away how God has moved through the writings on that blog. Today there have been over 5,000 hits on the blog. I have had women share with me that their husbands were going to church with them for the first time. I have had people tell me that they have had a deeper relationship with God because of this blog. The blog is God communicating His love to His people, and they are being changed.
Ephesians 3:20 tells us:
“Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us…
Our study this year is about great characters of the Bible. These men and women were flawed and weak like you and me. But we learn from them that God can do more than ever imagined as they surrender and give Him control of their lives.
Some of you here this morning are facing great trials in your own life. God’s promises are for you to claim. When you surrender your burdens to Him, you open up the possibilities for God to do immeasurably more than you could imagine. He really is at His best when life is at its worst. Take one day at a time, and keep your eyes on Him, the keeper and finisher of your faith.
Closing Prayer:
Heavenly Father, you are a miracle-working God, and your word promises to make a way for us where there appears to be no way. We claim your promises and count on you to demonstrate your honor and majesty in our lives. We will be sure to give you all of the praise, because we know that you are truly at your best in the darkest of valleys. Your promises will preserve our lives. Thank you Jesus, Amen.
