I have taken on a huge task of going through all of our photo albums and picking out photos to scan onto a disk so that I can make a DVD for my mother's (big number) birthday in January. Last night I felt like Chevy Chase in the movie Christmas Vacation when I started getting sad when reliving sweet times gone by.
I did not feel sad looking back at my childhood, although I had a good one. I did not feel sad looking back at teenage years, although they were fun. I did not even feel sad looking at pictures of Jon and I in our twenties, although I would like to look like that now.
I felt really, really sad when I looked at the pictures of us when the girls were young (parents will understand). Those sweet times of two little girls in pig tails. They idolized me for one thing (I miss that), but life was much slower and simpler. Some people don't realize what they have until it is gone. I remember distinctly thinking, on many occasions, this is truly the best time of my life. Sometimes I would give every penny I own to go back...
I have stage 4 cancer people! I am allowed a pity party once a year!
Do you ever have anxiety over living your life well? I sometimes look back and think I would have done things differently knowing what I know today. I am sure everyone feels that way every now and then. I wish I would have taught my girls early on that chores are fun...
Pastor Jim talked about this subject last Sunday. He talked about how we have a legacy when we follow God's Word that is beyond any legacy we could make without Him. No matter how we live, if we live for Crist, we are credited with this amazing legacy we did not earn.
I liked Jim's analogy of a great piece of music. A high school band could play a piece by Beethoven, and not play it well. Does that mean that the written music is bad? No, it is a masterpiece and everyone knows that it is the band that did not do it justice.
We accept the legacy of Jesus and become part of the story, but we can't ever live up to or destroy the true masterpiece that was written by God. The cool thing is that we get credited with that legacy!
When I look at these picture albums (yes, all hard copy neatly fitted into slots with headers), I know that some day they will be in the hands of someone who is looking at Grandma Rachel or Michelle and not feel the need to keep all of these mementos. They will get thrown away. But, if I am credited with the legacy of God, then (hopefully) that great grandchild of mine will still be living the life that we instilled in our girls, who instilled in their children.
Of all the things that people say about me (charming, pretty, funny, etc...ha ha), I hope they say,
"Sandy had amazing faith. I want what she had." Then they can start their own legacy. One that truly counts.
Blessings,
Sandy
