Every so often you will see someone write on Facebook something very honest and real, but most of the time it is filled with good news of shopping finds, children's accomplishments, or what fun activity the family did over the weekend. I have known it to be a good venue for asking for prayer, like this week when a friend was unexpectedly put in the hospital. The encouragement and love was overflowing on her Facebook Wall. I have certainly benefited from this same outpouring of love via Facebook. My husband is new to Facebook, and he said this week, "It is all very nice."
One thing I want to be sensitive of is that life is not always very Facebook worthy. There are fights with kids, misunderstanding with husbands, moments that you would not want plastered all over the Internet. Imagine posting, "Today was a horrible day. I snapped at my children because I was stressed and tired, and I hurt their feelings." or "Tonight we gathered to say our bedtime prayers and the kids got in a fight over a hair bow so we all went to bed irritated, and we did not pray."
Welcome to my house. It is not a perfect house. God does wonders with many things, but it is still a house of real and failed people who don't always say and do everything in a manner that would please the Lord. We don't always have our priorities straight, and we have moments (often) that require an apology to the person we hurt, and to God.
If you have ever looked at the Boulware Family and thought we lived on a heavenly cloud of perfectness, you should know that we are just like everyone else. I don't think my family wants me to tell you all their failings, so I will just share mine. My ongoing mistake is talking or acting out before I think. There are times (often) that I wish I had a "Pause" button that I could push right before I do something I am going to regret.
Failed but forgiven. The key here is that with Jesus in our hearts, we can be set back upright, brushed off, and sent again on life's way because we have a God that knows we will never be perfect. He hopes we will learn our lessons, but is a realist when it comes to a perfect life for us on earth. Hence, God sent His Son to pay the price for those things that could cause bigger issues and lead us into bondage.
Deep inside though, we yearn for being better. We know our weaknesses and want to conquer them. We get mad when we make the same mistakes. We know there is something better out there for us, and often we forget there is a "someone" who not only expects better from us, but is willing to walk along side us and offer great council and patience so that we can realize our true potential.
There is a secret set within each of our hearts. It often goes unnoticed, we rarely can put words to it, and yet it guides us throughout the days of our lives. This secret remains hidden for the most part in our deepest selves. It is simply the desire for life as it was meant to be. Isn't there a life you have been searching for all your days? You may not always be aware of your search, and there are times when you seem to have abandoned looking altogether. But again and again it returns to us, this yearning that cries out for the life we prize. It is elusive, to be sure. It seems to come and go at will. Seasons may pass until it surfaces again. And though it seems to taunt us, and may at times cause us great pain, we know when it returns that it is priceless. For if we could recover this desire, unearth it from beneath all other distractions, and embrace it as our deepest treasure, we would discover the secret of our existence - John Eldridge
I am not perfect, but I have become purposeful. It was something that eluded me all my life, but it took cancer to find it. I prayed, for many years, that God would take me and mold me into something better. I knew I could be better. I am now doing what I was designed to do in life, but I have found that I am even more humbled because God has taken my weakness and made them strengths, and He uses me even though life is still not perfect. Why would He choose me still stirs me deep inside. He took a failed and obscure girl with poor English and writing skills and gave her a Blog that would go out all over the world.
The key to finding your purpose is to have a willing heart for Christ and a continued relationship with Him through prayer and scripture. When you desire to be better and give those human failing over to God, He can take them and turn them into an amazing gift that is only made perfect through His molding and love.
Each time he said, "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness." So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. - 2 Corinthians 12:9
Not perfect, but purposeful,
Sandy
